High mountains and a faithful Father

It is  one a.m. and  I cannot sleep ( again). It is hot and humid, The sheets are twisted and damp. I toss and turn and the year ahead lies like a mountain in front of me. There are so many seemingly insurmountable challenges that our family will face and all I seem to be able to do is turn them over and over in my head. And catastrophise ( my husband says I do really well at this). I feel as if I am standing in the foothills of a very high mountain range. On the other side lies a peaceful valley but all I can see are the steep, jagged cliffs of the mountain range, waiting to snare and destroy weary travellers. The wind howls in the heights and snow covers every path.

I cannot see a way over these mountains and I am fearful and feel defeated before the journey even begins. So much will be required of me this year. Time, money, emotions, energy. A dying to self in order to thrive . A giving of myself to others so that they may grow. These are only the things I see. What of the unknown, the beasts that lie in wait in caves and on lonely mountain passes, waiting to devour and destroy the traveller who dares pass by ?

And as I lie there in my bed, fearful and frozen, the words of Psalm 121 whisper to me, coming quietly through the chaos of my thoughts.

Psalm 121

¹ I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
    where does my help come from?
² My help comes from the Lord,
    the Maker of heaven and earth.

³ He will not let your foot slip—    he who watches over you will not slumber;
⁴ indeed, he who watches over Israel
    will neither slumber nor sleep.

⁵ The Lord watches over you—
    the Lord is your shade at your right hand;
⁶ the sun will not harm you by day,
    nor the moon by night.

⁷ The Lord will keep you from all harm—
    he will watch over your life;
⁸ the Lord will watch over your coming and going
    both now and forevermore.

 

My God and Father is the maker of these mountains. He knows the path that I am meant to take to make it through these mountains, even if I cannot see the way. He will guide me and keep me safe. I just need to trust Him fully. AND TAKE THE FIRST STEP. It is so easy for me to worry and so hard for me to trust but I know that if I am to make it through all that lies ahead this year, then I need to lean on God and trust Him completely in everything. So I am putting one foot in front of the other, leaning hard on my Father and grasping His hand tightly as we go into this new year together

Cross references:

1. Psalm 121:2 : S Ge 1:1
2. Psalm 121:2 : S Ps 104:5; Ps 115:15
3. Psalm 121:4 : Ps 127:1
4. Psalm 121:5 : S Ps 1:6
5. Psalm 121:6 : Isa 49:10
6. Psalm 121:7 : S Ps 9:9
7. Psalm 121:8 : Dt 28:6